Apparently the only reason I live with my sister is because when her boyfriend goes to the mines for work ill be there so she won’t be alone. Like wtf?
I’m glad nobodies home to see me dance so stupidly whilst I cook to bedrock
gnarly: my computer screen is brighter than my future
the only aisle i’ll be walking down is the alcohol section of my local grocery store
When I die, I want someone to keep updating my...
sodamnrelatable: People be like “It’s colder than i thought it would be in hell.” “Send food” “Didn’t anyone tell them I’m claustrophobic?” “Umm…you guys…can you like…dig me up…I’m 6 feet under the ground in a coffin with my phone so uhhh yeah…” “Omg, Satan is so funny!” “Hell isn’t that bad, at least you get internet :)” “Hitlers a badass!” “I’m gonna stop by some of your houses, see...
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If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “I like your shoelaces” that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now! Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president